Wednesday, 12 April 2017

Letter J - J is for Judgement

You know what the crazy thing about people my age? It's that about 90% of them will judge you for being different, for doing something no one else is or even for things you cannot help like an illness.
I speak based off experience when I say that people are quick to judge you but when it's too late, they'll pretend that they would've helped or been there for you.

Take suicide vs suicidal for example. These two aren't so different yet people's way of dealing with the two differs.


Let's see... when an individual is suicidal, people tend to take it lightly as though it's a phase or something they need to get over.
HOWEVER when suicide happens, you get people crying over them saying that if they knew about it, they "would've tried to help"

Now, I am in no way saying that this goes for everyone but I thought it was a good example of a situation which shows just how people can often be judgmental and not realize it until it's too late.

In my case I've gone through a similar situation which is a perfect example of my point. Back in high school, I went through a tough phase where panic attacks often took over me which resulted in my absence for most of my year 12. My two close friends at the time knew and offered support as they'd gone through similar situations but I mostly kept it all to myself.

Two years later when it was all over, I wasn't afraid to share my story with people and explain why I was so distant and away. "You should have told me. We could have helped you as a group" was the response I got when I opened up to a friend. By this point I felt so silly to think that I'd get judged and that people wouldn't understand... maybe I should have?
Months went by and I got asked a question by the same person about something new that I had shared.
"Why?" I got asked

I went to explain the medical term of my current problems which was basically the closing of my airways while sleeping and caused a disruptions in my sleep. This time I got a totally different reaction.
"lol weirdo" is what I got as a response.

At that point I wasn't sure whether they were just joking or were literally that ignorant to understand that I thought I trusted them. That person who once comforted me, who said that I should have spoken up, had now turned around and called me a weirdo for sharing something current.
The worst thing is that they are well educated in the health department.
I honestly cannot express how disappointed I was that I was right. 

They did not understand. 
They do not care. 
Only when it's too late, they say they would've.

Life doesn't work that way. You CANNOT go through it with "Would've, Could've and Should've"

How about you start paying attention now?
How about you offer support now?

Too often we think that society sucks for a number of reasons but I hope that people start to realize that YOU are part of that society so YOU have the power to be that change.

Don't let it be too late.

Lots of love,
Karine xx

Disclaimer: I am good. No, I am not in a bad place. I have had an enormous amount of support and this is based of past experience (not current).

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